Friday, December 7, 2012

Flawed by Kate Avelynn

Good Reads Summary
Flawed by Kate Avelynn

Sarah O’Brien is alive because of the pact she and her brother made twelve years ago — James will protect her from their violent father if she promises to never leave him. For years, she’s watched James destroy his life to save hers. If all he asks for in return is her affection, she’ll give it freely.

Until, with a tiny kiss and a broken mind, he asks for more than she can give.

Sam Donavon has been James’ best friend — and the boy Sarah’s had a crush on — for as long as she can remember. As their forbidden relationship deepens, Sarah knows she’s in trouble. Quiet, serious Sam has decided he’s going to save her. Neither of them realizes James is far more unstable than her father ever was, or that he’s not about to let Sarah forget her half of the pact . . .

My Thoughts
My rating:  2? or 2.5? or 3?of 5 stars

I don’t know! I just don’t know.

It took a couple of more beats before what I was feeling finally sunk in. At first, it irked me where things went: so sad, so senseless and almost a tad too neat. That in the end, it’s not about choosing between the one who loves her best versus the one who so desperately wants to save her. All those ups and downs (more downs really) of ‘will she, won’t she…’ and ‘I really hope she won’t’ moments. Only to get that ending?!

Too easy, I thought…

…but later I was feeling less irked, then more and more sad with maybe a teensy moment of my eyes tearing up (OK so maybe more than a moment) because the ending simply is so sad. I know that my feelings are all over the place for this one! Comparisons to Forbidden aren’t unwarranted as this got messy and uncomfortable beyond words… yet I read through the night despite the previous 11 hour work load.

Like Forbidden, here there are two kids forced to grow up much too fast. Only up the horror a higher degree, for it’s not just an absent mother leaving them to their own devise that devils them, here they’ve an abusive father and drugged up mother to contend with as well. It’s these secrets shared that push him to be the man of the house to protect her. Then there’s that additional fear of something worse happening to her at the hands of the one who’s suppose to care.

Yet despite all that, I found FLAWED to be precisely that, flawed that is. Less somehow (less, at least, when I compare it what I recall feeling with Forbidden.) In the second, it’s obvious that they’re both just young kids and that there’s this is uncertainty… that even up to the very last moment while I wasn’t cheering them on (I really couldn’t have as it would have been impossible to do so,) at least I saw where things were coming from. But in FLAWED, the wrongness of everything is more obviously felt so that I was less conflicted about what I wanted to happen. My conviction was only made stronger because there were choices open here; options that had me hoping/wishing/wanting desperately that she’d go one way instead of another at least till the very end. All the while I’m hoping that she’s going to pick the one best for her.

I will say this: that title is perfect. She’s flawed, hiding away and seeing things or not seeing things for what they are. She starts of oblivious to things… or perhaps not completely so? Perhaps it’s more apt to describe her as one of those head in sand protagonists? The signs were there and it’s obvious that things weren’t right, from dad to mom to brother there all doing something wrong. Or is head in sand too harsh? Because they’re living as best they can, though living really isn’t what they’re doing. Surviving? Coping? Whatever it was that was going on, things and feelings got twisted. Then there’s James, the brother whose brother’s flaws are the main thing that sticks out… controlling, possessive. He became less than what I was hoping into an almost one-dimensional baddy portrayed as he was.

But it’s in Sam that I was surprised. Sam says all the right words and does mostly the right things. It’s his presence in this that’s almost too perfect. He calls her out but wants to save her. He uses words like too dependent and not knowing where one or the other starts… and it’s all simply right and true. Yet, there’s something missing from him too. Maybe it’s that he’s the only too perfect character in this book... and that is his flaw.

Like I said: I don’t know! I just don’t know.

Again: 2? or 2.5? or 3?

View all my reviews

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